Directed by Marcus Reyes
You’re probably thinking, “Kyle, you ignorant slut, Audition is a masterpiece of J-Horror from the 90s. It certainly didn’t come out this year.” You’re right! Audition was one of the best horror movies of the 90s, and some people even call it the best J-Horror movie ever made! But I’m not here to sing the praises of Audition, I’m here to tell you all about The Audition, the American adaptation of the novel Audition was also based on. You probably have a lot of questions now, like how did the producers of this movie get their hands on the film rights to Audition, and how is there another American remake of Audition in production right now if this is also an American adaptation of Audition? While I don’t have any real information regarding this production I will note that neither the opening nor closing credits acknowledge either the 90s film or the original novel, so for all intents and purposes this seems like an unauthorized remake at best, and blatant intellectual property theft at worst. That’s for the lawyers to figure out though, all that matters is if The Audition is a good movie, so I’m going to mostly talk about The Audition on its own terms. Unfortunately, that won’t help The Audition, because it is easily one of the worst movies of 2026.
Starting off in a hospital (which is totally real and definitely not a cheap set) Noah says goodbye to his loving wife, who is tragically stricken by a fatal case of vague-itis. While on her deathbed, she tells him to find happiness after she is gone, which Noah has trouble doing. After waiting a respectable year, filmmaker Noah and his partner/producer Darius put a new movie into production, where Noah happens to meet Miya (Maya?) a woman who Noah takes an immediate romantic interest in. Unfortunately for Noah, Miya/Maya isn’t as wholesome as she appears, and Noah soon learns that this lady is full of dark secrets. Dark secrets that threaten to tear apart Noah’s second chance at love.
Reading that summary, this probably sounds like a thrilling story, a steamy romp in forbidden desire and mysterious pasts. It could be that, if the movie wasn’t so damn boring. Everything is slow and drawn out, not just because the scenes are padded, though they kind of are, but because there is incredibly little style to be had anywhere. Each scene is flat, shot with minimal sound and lighting, and featuring an amusing blend of uncertain dialogue delivered by people who seem like they were told their lines moments before shooting. I don’t want to come down too hard on the actors, but this was not any of their finest moments.
I cannot emphasize enough how ‘bare bones’ this entire production is, to the point where the whole movie feels like a cheap rush job that cuts lots of corners. So many little things jump out as being stuff that could have easily been fixed, if they cared to do so. For example, during one of their first meetings, Noah and Miya/Maya agree to meet at a coffee shop called “Brewed Awakenings”, (which is an okay pun) but when they arrive at the shop, the door clearly says a different name. This isn’t a big deal at all, but when there is so little happening your brain begins scanning shots, looking for something to occupy it, and if the filmmakers can’t be bothered to fix the small mistakes, what’s the chance they can get the big things right?
Another scene has those two at a nice dinner, and even though their first course is in front of them, they avoid even looking at it, let alone eating any of it, because I’m sure they didn’t have any other plates prepared to use for additional shots should they need them. Why not have them eating a salad, something designed to be a little messy and chaotic, something they could interact with rather than sitting like manakins during a supposedly romantic dinner? Again, I know that seeing them eat isn’t critical to the story, but when so much of the movie seems stiff and unnatural, these sequences where regular human interaction gets deftly avoided stand out.
Because it is impossible to think about The Audition without thinking about Audition, I will allow myself one paragraph where I compare the two directly. The worst thing The Audition does, besides being dull, is how it sands down all the edges of Audition but then doesn’t replace them with anything. Every moment in Audition that was gross, shocking, subversive, or unpleasant is unceremoniously removed, with nothing but a blank space left to taunt you with your memories of what once was. Even the finale is neutered, with the brutality of the classic movie cut out for reasons unknown. But don’t worry, we get some great evil glowing eye effects to show you how diabolical our villain is. Alright, comparison over.
The only question that comes to mind is :why? Why make this movie? Why make an adaptation of a classic novel that already has a universally beloved adaptation but then not do anything to differentiate this version from that one? Why does the production seem so cheaply thrown together when you know that audiences will inevitably compare it to an immaculately made thriller? Why strip out the romance, sensuality, and horror from a story that needs all those to function? If this was some attempt at a fan film or passion project to pay homage to one of the best thrillers of all time, you need to be upfront about that, because not acknowledging it and throwing the finished project on Tubi makes this seem like just a cheap knockoff. Regardless of why, that leaves us with something regrettable, it leaves us with a movie that no one has any reason to watch.
